Big Girl
Reading is hands down one of my favorite pastimes. I love reading just about any genre of book out there. As of right now, I have 13 books stacked in my room waiting patiently to be read. I really should just stay away from Barnes & Noble because it just feeds my addiction to buy MORE books that sit in my pile that I end up reading in about a year. But as soon as I saw Big Girl, read the short synopsis on the back, I knew I had to purchase it and read it immediately.
Written by senior features writer at Refinery29, Kelsey Miller tells her tale of dieting and working towards a thin body throughout her whole life, only to break down and go back to her same unhealthy habits. Hitting bottom at age 29, she realizes that all she needs is to be comfortable in her body, and how to live according to her body's instincts.
I knew I had to make this purchase and read about Miller's story, because her story reminded me of myself. For a long time (I'm talking about since I was in 9th grade) I hated myself. I hated how I looked, I hated transitioning into high school, and I hated that I was so full of hate. Throughout high school, I did my best to eat right and move as much as I could, but I never started really paying attention to it until I came to college.
It's inevitable, the Freshman 15. It happens to just about everyone, and of course it happened to me. The summer after my freshman year, I started dieting and working out 5 days a week. By the time we went to the beach in July, I was down 20 pounds and couldn't be happier! Everyone told me how great I looked and how proud they were that I stuck to this healthy lifestyle. Then it became unhealthy.
When I went back to school, a lot happened during my first semester. I went through a pretty rough breakup, lived with 5 other girls in a suite, and was struggling to keep up with my classes. Because of my constant worrying, stressing, and focus on losing more weight, I barely ate and survived on water and spinach salads. By the time we went home for winter break, I was severely underweight and was by no means healthy. It was a rough road I went down and by this point, after being diagnosed with depression and anxiety, I had an extremely hard time accepting myself. I didn't gain the weight back and become a healthier version of myself again for about another year and a half, the second semester of my junior year.
I can happily say though, that today I am loving and enjoying life and learning to eat and exercise in a way that's right for me.
Miller talks about 'Intuitive Eating'; eating based on your body's signals that let you know when you are actually hungry, stop eating when you are full, and learning to trust yourself around food. A big part of intuitive eating is mindfulness. For at least one meal a day, Miller would shut down all distractions. No phone, no laptop, just her and her meal. Without the distractions, she found that she could identify when she was full and even a health pace in which she would eat. I've been trying this for about a week now, and it works! Instead of eating five slices of pizza while browsing Instagram, I realize that I am truly full about two slices. And to be honest, I'm left just as satisfied and not uncomfortably full.
Featured on Good Morning America (click the link above to view the clip) and interviewed on a podcast (video above), Miller talks about intuitive eating and her 'Anti-Diet Project' as a part of Refinery29.
Whether you're struggling with your body image or self-esteem, are trying (and maybe failing) to diet, or even if you just want something new to read, I encourage you to check out Big Girl. After finishing the book, it has truly opened my eyes in a way that life is short and we all need to enjoy it.
For more about the Anti-Diet Project, visit the link below:
Thanks for reading!
